Post by MaryS on Feb 7, 2012 12:23:02 GMT -5
Additional Gaits of the Horse
--The Boink One-beat gait with suspension, often exhibited by horses ridden into a field of white-tailed deer.
--The Lateral Swoop A sudden sideways leap with shoulder horizontal to the ground, leaving the rider hovering briefly over where the saddle used to be before descending to the ground. Can be precipitated by a tractor starting up outside the arena, snow sliding off the arena roof, a large rock that magically turns into a bear or a black plastic garbage bag.
--The Whirling Dervish Advanced version of the Lateral Swoop in which the horse spins like a top, frequently launching the hapless rider a long distance by centrifugal force. Specialty of certain Arabians, often caused by viewing a 4-wheeler approaching on the trail ahead... or a huge piece of straw lurking in an otherwise sandy arena.
--The Yahooey One of the natural Airs Above the Ground, a highly suspended movement exhibited when turned out or during the first canter in an open field. A variation is the Jet-Assisted Buck & Fart, in which the horse achieves maximum height and momentum. aided by the loud expulsion of exhaust gas. Occurs on cold, windy days when the wind goes up the horse's tail and blows his brains out his ears.
--The Omigod Sudden backwards movement accompanied by loud, rolling snorts, ears stiffly forward and eyes bugging out, exhibited by a horse that has spotted a monster (invisible to the human eye) advancing on him from the front. Can be precipitated in visible form by riding up to a large blue tarp, which the wind then moves slightly.
--The Hot Wheels Speed gait in which all four legs rotate at high speed, often leaving rubber patches on the ground (as in "lay a patch.".) Frequently exhibited by runaway ponies, jumpers rushing fences, and horses returning to the barn.
--The Shark Circling the Rowboat Characteristic movement of lesson horse in ever-decreasing concentric circles around the instructor, until the horse is in center ring, standing on the instructor's left foot, and further progress is impossible. (Old school horses tell new school horses how to do this.)
--The Sloth Typical gait of school horse who has perfected the art of laziness. No perceptible forward movement, in spite of encouraging kicks, clucks, flapping reins, ineffective crop swats, shouts and jumping up and down. (Note: the Sloth can be transformed into Hot Wheels by the sight of the instructor advancing with longe whip in hand.)
--The Flapper Movement in which the horse shakes like a wet dog, totally terrifying the beginner rider. Horse then grins an evil grin and refuses to move.
--The Wallow Rotational movement performed on the ground, especially in mud, sand or water. Always performed when the instructor is not looking.
--Followed by the Oopsie Daisy Which always occurs just as the instructor turns to look. Horse perfects and gets certification for the sequence by unseating at least a dozen unsuspecting riders.
--The Snail Rocket The two walking gaits of experienced trail horses, on the trail. Going out, the walk is so snail-like that time slwos perceptibly. Coming back, the Snail Rocket trots so fast that trotting horses can barely keep up with his Rocket Walk. Essentially, horses perfectly understand the laws of physics, e.g.: the speed of the walk is directly proportional to the direction on the trail.
--The Bobber Gait which old experienced horses proceed with child or beginner on back. Walk a few feet, stop, horse pulls reins through hands of beginning rider and lowers head to eats grass. Repeat 50 times.
--The Boink One-beat gait with suspension, often exhibited by horses ridden into a field of white-tailed deer.
--The Lateral Swoop A sudden sideways leap with shoulder horizontal to the ground, leaving the rider hovering briefly over where the saddle used to be before descending to the ground. Can be precipitated by a tractor starting up outside the arena, snow sliding off the arena roof, a large rock that magically turns into a bear or a black plastic garbage bag.
--The Whirling Dervish Advanced version of the Lateral Swoop in which the horse spins like a top, frequently launching the hapless rider a long distance by centrifugal force. Specialty of certain Arabians, often caused by viewing a 4-wheeler approaching on the trail ahead... or a huge piece of straw lurking in an otherwise sandy arena.
--The Yahooey One of the natural Airs Above the Ground, a highly suspended movement exhibited when turned out or during the first canter in an open field. A variation is the Jet-Assisted Buck & Fart, in which the horse achieves maximum height and momentum. aided by the loud expulsion of exhaust gas. Occurs on cold, windy days when the wind goes up the horse's tail and blows his brains out his ears.
--The Omigod Sudden backwards movement accompanied by loud, rolling snorts, ears stiffly forward and eyes bugging out, exhibited by a horse that has spotted a monster (invisible to the human eye) advancing on him from the front. Can be precipitated in visible form by riding up to a large blue tarp, which the wind then moves slightly.
--The Hot Wheels Speed gait in which all four legs rotate at high speed, often leaving rubber patches on the ground (as in "lay a patch.".) Frequently exhibited by runaway ponies, jumpers rushing fences, and horses returning to the barn.
--The Shark Circling the Rowboat Characteristic movement of lesson horse in ever-decreasing concentric circles around the instructor, until the horse is in center ring, standing on the instructor's left foot, and further progress is impossible. (Old school horses tell new school horses how to do this.)
--The Sloth Typical gait of school horse who has perfected the art of laziness. No perceptible forward movement, in spite of encouraging kicks, clucks, flapping reins, ineffective crop swats, shouts and jumping up and down. (Note: the Sloth can be transformed into Hot Wheels by the sight of the instructor advancing with longe whip in hand.)
--The Flapper Movement in which the horse shakes like a wet dog, totally terrifying the beginner rider. Horse then grins an evil grin and refuses to move.
--The Wallow Rotational movement performed on the ground, especially in mud, sand or water. Always performed when the instructor is not looking.
--Followed by the Oopsie Daisy Which always occurs just as the instructor turns to look. Horse perfects and gets certification for the sequence by unseating at least a dozen unsuspecting riders.
--The Snail Rocket The two walking gaits of experienced trail horses, on the trail. Going out, the walk is so snail-like that time slwos perceptibly. Coming back, the Snail Rocket trots so fast that trotting horses can barely keep up with his Rocket Walk. Essentially, horses perfectly understand the laws of physics, e.g.: the speed of the walk is directly proportional to the direction on the trail.
--The Bobber Gait which old experienced horses proceed with child or beginner on back. Walk a few feet, stop, horse pulls reins through hands of beginning rider and lowers head to eats grass. Repeat 50 times.
